Dear Mamacita,

I know you don’t speak much English but I know how you feel. You are unhappy, you feel trapped, but there’s nothing you can do about it. I think you’re beautiful and worth so much more than what you’re given. I’d like to look at all your shoes someday, just to keep you company. Some people like to say mean things about you like you’re too fat to leave your home and get down the flight of stairs or you should be called Mamasota but I think they’re mean and I try to stand up for you. You must be home sick. Do you miss your old house in Mexico? Was that house better than living in Mexico? Was that house better than living in a run down apartments with a man that finds you disgusting sometimes? I wish I could figure these things about you. You want to go back home, I wish I could help you feel more at home. I know how it feels to not belong, I don’t belong in my home either. My sisters and brothers are all so very different from me. You must have had so many friends back at home, I wish I could meet them. Did you even want to come to America? What brought you guys here? The only thing that keeps you in your old home must be your connection to Spanish. I’m sorry that, that’s all you have. Never let go of that part of you, no matter what your husband says. Don’t get upset that your son is probably never going to experience the world you grew up in, but don’t get upset about that.

Sincerely, Esperanza